WolfCop - Poster
In theaters June 6, 2014
This is how Derek Hale gets arrested, AGAIN, protesting outside the Beacon Hills movie theater with a sign he made that says: REPRESENTATION, NOT EXPLOITATION. Or—that’s not how he gets arrested. He’s out there for most of opening weekend, wearing various sweaters in cosy colors. He has some pamphlets, if people are interested. He dutifully explains to people who say, look, the werewolf is the HERO in the movie, what’s the problem? Again and again. No actual werewolves were involved in this movie in any way—that would have been a good start. It doesn’t matter if he’s the hero if the movie still portrays being a werewolf as a freakish, terrifying, disgusting thing that happens to your body instead of a core part of your identity. This movie is lurid fetishization dressed up as progress. Here’s a list of independent werewolf films if you’re interested.
How he gets arrested is that Isaac shows up late on Saturday night, takes one look at the college kids laughing at Derek while he talks to an NPR-Mom, and leans in and snatches their tickets out of their hands, rips them in half.
"Don’t worry about it, you can still see a werewolf," he snarls, grabbing one of them by the shirtfront, fangs dropping. Derek pulls him off, but not before he clocks one of them pretty good. They both spend the night in jail.
NPR-mom testifies at the trial. Derek is cleared. Isaac gets community service and discovers his talents at teaching toddlers gymnastics at the local Boys and Girls Club. The makers of Wolf Cop issue a formal apology. Claw and Order, a gritty crime drama where most of the wolf characters are played by real werewolves and they have a werewolf script advisor, debuts on HBO with record-breaking ratings. Derek has it on his DVR but is 13 episodes behind because it’s intense and sometimes really sad.
Pack + 1 is on ABC at 8:00 on Fridays; it’s an hour-long family dramedy about a dysfunctional pack and their reluctant emissary, who learn lessons about love and trust after taking in an orphaned wolf pup. Derek watches it live and then downloads it from Itunes and also he bought the soundtrack for season 1, but that’s because it’s important to show support, he says, it’s not—it’s just—it’s a kid’s show, but—but. It’s pretty well written, he mutters.
Change begins at home.